h1

try, try again?

January 20, 2007

status update:

NEGATIVES

  • gained two pounds back
  • pissed off roommate, she’s so obnoxious and just TOO MUCH sometimes, yet somehow out of all of us girls, i’m the only one who can’t keep my annoyance on the inside
  • got (easily) pulled into drinking too much last night
  • became drunken slut who hit on very hot boy, only just had enough presence of mind to not continue to embarass myself further (although damage was already done)
  • ignored one of my best guy friends because was hitting on hot boy
  • have cut on side of my head from when my friend decided to tackle me, caused me to slip on ice and fall into a cement wall
  • exhausted from not sleeping well
  • didn’t get into fordham law
  • didn’t go to work on thursday
  • missed the first class of the semester for two different courses. sort of not my fault. my only consolation is that i skipped the hell out of stuff last semester and got a 4.0. i have decent, if not brilliant, brains (although i’m sure tequila will finish all my little grey cells off if i don’t stop binge-drinking soon)
  • again hurting my already low bank account by getting overly generous with buying drinks/food for others at the bar
  • friend had brought two good books on politics to the bar for me and i may have left them somewhere; i’m hoping it was just in our DD’s car

POSITIVES

  • started my new exercise routine
  • got into university of miami law as well as UMD
  • took care of my (if imaginable) even more drunken girl friend last night, possibly kept her from hooking up with a friend visiting her from home
  • made it home alive and don’t have a hangover? (not that i ever get one…weird)
  • haven’t talked to dream boy for over a week since i told him we should probably stop trying to make a friendship work (of course, if he ims me again, i’ll be in trouble)

i’m stretching on some of those positives. and there are a lot more negatives.

starting to think that my life is like my dieting: just when i’m doing really well, down ten pounds, THAT’S when i lose it. it’s as if i’m so worried about gaining the weight back that i go the reverse route and eat everything in sight! i was 118 pounds and now i’m 120. i’d been really good all last week with the drinking and the boys and the exercising and being nice and then in one night i fuck it all up. three slices of pizza, two shots of tequila with assorted drinks, flirtation with 90% of the male population, and lip brush against Hot Boy (friend of a friend so i might see him again, oh god). i looked the fool.

try, try again?

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